I'm
doing a lot more thinking about the birth. (FYI: This is going to be a LONG post and I've been writing and adding stuff to it for a while!) This is a huge place of anxiety and
worry for me. I am so torn about the decision of what kind of birth to have and
all the little decisions that go into that. Because Lila arrived by emergency
c-section, it's my choice if I want to do a repeat c-section (RCS) or vaginal
birth after c-section (VBAC). I'm apparently great candidate for VBAC because I
went into labor on my own, got to 5 cm and because my c-section was due to cord
and heart-rate issues and isn't something that should happen again with this
baby.
Most
people in my situation opt for a RCS and I don't blame them. If you've had a
traumatic delivery experience where you were told your baby's life was in
danger - a planned, calm surgical procedure sounds pretty good. It's not an
easy choice by any means though, because even if your first c-section recovery
(like mine) was fine, it's still surgery! A c-section means at least 2 nights
in the hospital but likely 3 or more, longer recovery with restrictions on
lifting, stair-climbing and driving, greater chances of complications for the
mom during surgery (as compared to a vaginal birth), and some studies have
shown more breathing and breastfeeding issues in newborns born via
c-section.
The
concern with VBAC is uterine rupture. Because I have a scar on my uterus, there
is a small chance that the scar could come apart during labor or really anytime
during pregnancy which could be fatal for the baby. This is very scary but a
rupture happens in only .6% - 1% of VBAC attempts. A smaller percentage of that
percentage actually have a catastrophic outcome for baby or mom.
I
truly believe VBAC is the best choice for me and that is what I'm leaning
toward now, even though I'm pretty sure I would have a perfectly fine c-section
with an okay recovery. I am mainly concerned about the affect that a longer
hospital stay and recovery would have on Lila and her adjustment to the baby. I
also had a lot of difficulty nursing Lila in the first 3 months which might
have been related her birth, but could also be due to other things. I really
want to do everything I can to make breastfeeding easier this time around.
The
other issue with a second c-section is that with each subsequent c-section the
risks grow greater. So if I was planning on more babies, I should really think
hard about doing another c-section because it would make my 3rd
birth a much riskier proposition. We are planning on this being my last
pregnancy, so it doesn’t really play much into my decision.
So
with all of that considered, I think I want to try to have a VBAC. Neil's
biggest concern with me attempting the VBAC is that I will feel like a failure
if I end up having to have a c-section anyway and that an emergency c-section
will be a lot harder to recover from than a planned one. I think I'd be no more
disappointed than I was last time. I actually think I'd be more disappointed if
I didn’t try at all and just elected to have the surgery. Giving baby and me a
chance at a vaginal birth is what I really want.
Earlier
on in my pregnancy I was considering switching hospitals and doctors to
increase my chances of successful VBAC. I sought out advice from the
International Caesarean Awareness Network (ICAN) group here in Cincinnati, and
many of those ladies encouraged me to look at a more supportive provider,
specifically Dr. Daniel Bowen, and a potentially more VBAC-friendly hospital
(Bethesda North).
In
the end, I’ve decided that sticking with my original doctors and delivering at
Mercy Fairfield will ease my anxiety about actually going into labor: Not
driving to a different hospital, worrying about whether my solo practitioner doctor
will make it to my birth, etc. I am sticking with what I know, and hopefully
that works out okay! They seem very supportive of VBAC and I like knowing that if something bad does happen I'd have skilled doctors right there at the hospital.
Enter
the next complication. My due date (40 weeks) is December 25. With Lila, I
didn't have her until 9 days after my due date, or 41 weeks and 2 days. There
is a good chance I will go "overdue" with this one as well, although
usually not as long as the first time. Most of the OBs in my practice have been
fine with letting me go 7-10 days over my due date. But they will not induce me
if I go that long, I will just go in for a c-section. Induction can cause more
stress on the uterus and is more likely to cause a rupture. I haven't asked
about other non-chemical induction/augmentation like Foley catheter, membrane
sweep or even low dose Pitocin. All of those I've read are the safest options
for getting labor going in VBAC births.
Now,
personally I'm fine with going over my due date and waiting until baby girl is
ready to come out. I've done it before I can do it again. I'm not all that
concerned with Christmas because Lila doesn't know any different and we can
celebrate on any day. My parents will be around during the holidays anyway, so
it will be fine if I go into labor during that time. The real issue is
insurance and the costs of the birth. It’s pretty unfortunate that this has to
be a consideration for us and what type of birth I will have.
If
I go much past my due date, there is a chance that even if baby is born in 2013
that my hospital stay could extend into 2014. I’ve checked with my insurance
company and if my birth and hospital stay spans into 2014 I will likely have to
pay two out-of-pocket maximums. So instead of a $4000 cost for birth (which we
have saved up for), we could be looking at $8000. I am already going to have to
take 2 months unpaid leave to take off as much time as I want, and I’m afraid
this cost will cause me to have to go back before baby and me are ready.
So
“worst case” scenario, I go into labor on Dec 30, am not released until Jan 1,
and have to pay two deductibles and two out of pocket max amounts. If I make it
to Jan 1 without going into labor, no problem I just go overdue into 2014 and
have the baby vaginally or end up with a RSC. But is it worth the financial
risk to possibly go into labor between Dec 28-31? It’s not like it’s easy to
keep a baby IN if it wants to get out, and vice versa.
I
know this is SO much information, but it’s actually really helpful for me to
type it all out instead of having all of it just spinning in my head.
So
after thinking it through I think I will try some natural induction techniques
(which probably won’t work) starting at 38 weeks. Nothing crazy, just staying
active, lots of walking etc. As it gets closer to my due date I may try more drastic induction techniques and ask my
doctor to sweep my membranes (which put me into labor last time) or if there is
anything else they can do to augment my labor or induce.
I'm also looking into some other things that can make my labor better/easier/quicker, such as taking Evening Primrose Oil (EPO), drinking Red Raspberry Leaf Tea, doing Spinning Babies techniques for good positioning and possibly even Hypnobabies, chiropractic care or acupuncture which I've heard and read can help.
I
think what I may have to do is schedule the c-section for Dec 27, which will likely
have me out of the hospital by Dec 31, but hope to go into labor before then. I
just don't think I want to risk it otherwise. Neil suggested complete bedrest
from Dec 28-31 to try to not go into labor and try to make it until the new
year. I don't think either of us are really comfortable with that idea.
The decision is tough. Birth is unpredictable and scary, especially when you have had a traumatic birth in your past and a giant scar on your uterus. I know another c-section is not the end of the world, and as it gets closer and things change, I may even opt to do the RCS. But right now, I think I need to put my energy into having a successful vaginal birth if that is in the cards for me. It's MY decision and I am going to do my best to listen to myself and what I think is right for me and my family.
Hey Lindsay, I know labor is scary, and mine wasn't anything at all like yours. I had a vaginal birth, and I'm thankful I did. It was hard, but three weeks later, I was running and feeling just fine. A c-section is very hard on your body, but I echo Neil's worry that you'd need to have a c-section and feel frustrated. I don't think that means you should throw in the towel, though. I think you're very brave for even considering VBAC, and I'm sure miss Rosie June will be fine either way. I know it's not an easy decision, but I hope you know that I think you're amazing for even considering it. If it were me and I'd had a very traumatic birth experience like yours with Lila, I'd say to heck with it! I'm sure you'll make the right decision, and in just a few months, you'll have it all behind you :)
ReplyDeleteThank you for the encouragement! It means a lot! I had a great appointment today and the doctor was very supportive. I'm scared, but hopeful!!
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